A couple of weeks ago, I saw quite a few tweets like this one:
I can see why someone would fear having a gay roommate. He might be scared of being checked out or that his roommate may come on to him. He could be afraid that his roommate will let his lust loose at night and attack him while he’s sleeping. I understand all of the stereotypical reasons why someone would be scared of a gay roommate.
Allow me to offer reassurance. If you’re the type of guy who who believes that your roommate will check you out or fall in love with you just because he’s gay, let me tell you one thing: no one will check you out or fall in love with you, because ignorance is more unattractive than a dead platypus covered in human pus.
There’s this weird stereotype that gay people, whether gay or straight, will immediately be attracted to any individual of their same sex. Like, because I’m gay, I’d immediately be attracted to some random guy walking down the street. And this is one of the most offensive stereotypes in existence, because it perpetuates a double standard that many people don’t even see. If a straight male were to see a female, that straight male would not automatically be attracted to her or fall in love with her. If a straight male were to sleep in the same room as a female, one cannot assume that he would rape her solely based on his sexuality.
What is the purpose of having a roommate in the first place? Is it not to have someone to help you throughout your time at university? Shouldn’t your roommate be someone who you can communicate with, someone who you can talk to about things, and someone who you share certain beliefs with? If that’s the case, why does the sexuality of your roommate matter anyway? I’d be much more curious in things like their tendency to snore, their taste in music, whether they smoke or not, or if they party all the time. Things that would actually affect my relationship with him, as opposed to who he’s attracted to.
If all of this still isn’t enough for you, you can always assume the role of a normal human being and talk to your roommate. You can tell your roommate that you are not interested in men (or women, if she is a lesbian) and express your concerns. They may be offended that you assumed they would come on to you, but I think they would understand and respect your wishes – even if they had no desire for you initially.
You may think that I have no experience in this type of ordeal because I’m a senior in high school, but I did stay at a college campus for a month over the summer with a roommate. He was an extremely talented saxophone player, and he was also super smart with a penchant for math and science. And, yes, he was straight. About after a week and a half into the program, I came out to him, and guess what – he didn’t care. We played board games, ate junk food, and stayed up until midnight talking about random stuff. I miss him, as well as all of the other friends I made there.
To sum up this post, before you say something stupid like “I hope my roommate isn’t gay,” please consider that every gay guy alive would rather live alone that with an uneducated bigot. I hope you all have had a wonderful week, and will continue to spread love wherever you go!