March 28, 2021 · 1:48 pm
The other day I had a thought spiral about whether I will ever date a man. I felt frustrated, wondering what I had done in my past life (e.g., vote for Ronald Reagan) to deserve my attraction to men, while simmering in the injustice of not having met a man who interests me. When I slowed down and named these thoughts and feelings, I realized: wait a second, I literally don’t care about dating a man. I would be 100% happy if someone told me right now that I will never meet a man I want to date, or if I’d meet this person in ten years, or five. I recognized then that my angst came less from a lack of romance and more so from a lack of control about when and how this person may emerge or not.
A few days ago, I got a text from my bio mom that reminded me of where some of my control issues come from. Continue reading →
Filed under Personal
Tagged as abuse, blackpink, books, caroline knapp, control, friendship, gay, growth, healing, mental health, self-awareness, trauma
July 2, 2014 · 8:57 am
The day after I published my post about hating straight white men, my blog reached 600,000 views – huzzah! This post itself acts as my 450th, and thus, I thought I would reward everyone
and make their confidence as drivers increase indirectly by sharing a picture of my somewhat ratchet parking, from the folder on my computer titled “Ratchet Parking Compilation”: Continue reading →
December 19, 2012 · 6:59 pm
The year isn’t even over yet and I’ve already won! Victory.
Two nights ago I submitted all of my college applications. I can’t pinpoint the feeling that followed – it was a mixture of hope, anxiety, euphoria, and relief.
I remember that at the beginning of high school, I had no idea who I was. I didn’t know my passions and I had no plans for the future. Self-deprecating thoughts consumed me and my fear of my mother made me anxious to escape, even though I had no idea how I would do that.
But I’ve made it so far, as cliche and conceited as that sounds. Continue reading →
January 7, 2012 · 8:03 am
Hi guys! I’ve decided to write this post
to prove that I actually have a life, ha to share with everyone what’s going on in my life and why my updates have been so infrequent as of 2012. I really do want to write and blog and what not, but unfortunately I’ve been suffering from a severe lack of time. Trust me – whenever I have an idea to blog about, I write it on an electronic sticky note which I proceed to post on my desktop… right now, the sticky notes are starting to overlap each other. I literally cannot see my desktop background.
Continue reading →