High School Senior Jacob Rudolph Comes Out: Do I Care?

Screenshot via the video Jonathan Rudolph posted on Youtube (link in post.)

If this happened in my high school, I’d probably politely clap and continue reading my novel observing the award ceremony.

No, really. The Yahoo! article about Mr. Jacob Rudolph reminds me of that article I read about the professional bowler who kissed his husband. There are more important happenings in our country and in the world – Morocco’s adjustment of its rape marriage law, North Korea’s promise to nuke the United States, and the horrible living conditions in Mali to name a few. I think that most of us can agree that there are bigger events that deserve the media’s attention, widespread occurrences that directly affect a larger amount of people.

But keep in mind that gays have gone through so much.

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Heteronormativity: I Kissed A Girl, Didn’t Like It So Much…

I remember sitting after school with a female friend of mine. I was helping her with some trigonometry homework and decided to bring up another problem – one unrelated to the unit circle and pi.

“So, comparative government has been kind of crazy lately, don’t you think?” I asked, turning to look at her.

“Yeah, with the election and everything everyone’s been kind of politically charged,” she replied.

I ventured on, “Do you mind if I ask for your opinion on a couple of risque subjects?”

She put down her pencil and said, “Sure, no problem.”

Let me make myself clear – I’m not the type of guy who makes assumptions without evidence. But, to put it bluntly, I thought that maybe – maybe – this female friend of mine might have had a teeny crush on me. Me, as in, a homosexual. From inviting me to Homecoming, to casually consistent brushes and touches, to other questionable remarks, the evidence added up. I wasn’t sure, and I’m still not sure, but after months of waiting I wanted to establish the firm boundary of friendship before things got ugly.

“What do you think of abortion?” I asked.

To Come Out or To Not Come Out… That is the Question

As requested by an individual who commented on this blog, here is a post dedicated to answering the question: should I, or should I not come out? Before I begin, let me make it clear – just because I am gay does not mean I can control what other gay people do, or the outcomes of their actions. This is simply my two cents on the somewhat sensitive subject matter. Heck, if you’re straight, you should try coming out too! You might earn a few blank stares, but at least it won’t be because you’re so ugly you turn people to stone like me. In fact, I think it is a worthy endeavor, because you would be forcing yourself into the shoes of those who have to announce their sexualities.

Let me reiterate that this is an umbrella post designed to give a general idea of whether one should come out or not. There are many factors that play into a decision like this, even if the decision shouldn’t be a big one at all. Please don’t hesitate to comment or message me with individual concerns or questions, or to suggest that I write about anything else – related to homosexuality or unrelated to homosexuality.

An easy way to structure this would be to split up my post into pros and cons. I’ll start with the cons, because everyone knows that seeing the rainbow is worth standing in the rain.

My Coming Out Post

Yesterday, I was talking to a friend I had made at the summer program I’m currently attending.

“What will you tell them?” I asked her. I was referring to her friends at home – I was curious about how she would describe me.

“I need to preface it by telling them you’re gay. No guy self-deprecates as much as you do, or says the things that you do,” she said.

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One of my best friends told me that I shouldn’t write a coming out post. If people are reading what I write and responding well, why tell them? I agree with her, in a sense.

But there are a myriad of people who stereotype gays. There are those who are curious about gays. They talk about gays. They throw around slurs and rumors and categorize people because they are gay. It’s funny, because gays receive so much attention, but so few rights.