Why You Shouldn’t Hate Straight White Men

“I’m scared to talk about what’s bothering me,” he said.

“I’m scared to walk back to the dorm at night alone,” she said.

A few months ago, I locked myself in my college’s library to study for final exams. While procrastinating focusing on Social Psychology, I overheard a conversation between a boy and a girl studying in the cubicles to my right.

He shuffled some of his books around. “It’s not a big deal anyway. Every time I try to talk about it with her, I feel weird-,”

“Yeah, well, you should see me every time I go out.” She sighed, either from the stress of finals or the minutiae of her friend’s problem. “If you think you have it bad, try imagining every guy in the room thinking you want it just because you’re wearing a short dress.”

The aspiring therapist inside of me wanted to reach out and console both of them about their issues, but instead, I shook my head, turned up my music, and saved their conversation as material for a future blog post.

Does anyone see how this post actually contributes to equality? Because I don’t.

I identify as male, so I will not pretend to know what it feels like to be catcalled, paid less for equal performance, or judged just based on my appearance.

Homophobia: Hypocrisy Optional

Here’s something you wouldn’t hear on the street without a few heads turning: I’m not racist, I just don’t think black people deserve to get married! Lately I’ve encountered several statements from various individuals – ranging from online posts to acquaintances in real life – that have offended me in a way akin to the example above. Here’s the definition of homophobia, in case anyone has forgotten.

Antipathy (noun): A deep-seated feeling of dislike; aversion. Example: I have an antipathy toward Calculus and cat-haters.

At least people who recognize their resentment toward homosexuals don’t deny their beliefs. Others, however, adopt a “holier than thou” attitude under the pretense that they actually accept gay people… for the most part. Allow me to share a few examples.

Bisexuality, Common Sense, and Cute Bisexual Dolphins

Here’s the bad news: there’s been some serious biphobia stirring in the gay community. Let me repeat, the gay community. Not like it’s okay for straight people to hate bisexuals, but I find it ironic that those who suffer prejudice due to their sexualities would perpetuate the cycle further. It’s similar to how I find it strange when black people condemn homosexuality using biblical arguments, when those same arguments kept them from getting married (and kept them enslaved) not too many years ago.

Dan Savage, a leader in the gay community, cast doubt on the authenticity of those who declare themselves bisexual. Glee, a popular musical comedy well-known for its support of gay rights, sends negative messages regarding bisexuality on several occasions. No one is perfect and even those who preach tolerance make mistakes, but if these paragons of acceptance diss bisexuality, who knows how many people will follow in their footsteps?

Let me tell you a secret.

Gay Rights and the Big Picture

I am aware that this tweet was taken before the election, it’s great that President Obama won!

Lately, I’ve heard a lot of people say that gay rights isn’t a “big picture” issue. They say that things like the economy or foreign affairs matters more, and that being gay only affects a limited amount of people – so, it should be shoved aside until our country can resolve other problems.

I understand that people have priorities and certain things that affect them. Everyone is supposed to care about different subjects, and people are supposed to disagree, otherwise, nothing new would arise. I understand that money has a huge effect on our country’s prosperity and its overall position in the world – it’s truly unfortunate that so many people are struggling to make ends meet.

But I do not understand how anyone can assume that gay rights isn’t a key part of the big picture.